aprender (to learn).

I started Spanish lessons last week. At first, we reviewed the basics (the alphabet, greetings, days of the week, months) but this week we dove in. More vocabulary (mucho mas), verb conjugation, homework! Though it is exciting to learn and retain new things, I'm afraid I have a limited amount of space in my brain. It's almost as if with each Spanish word I remember, somewhere an English one is deleted. I find myself forgetting words far more often than a 28 year old should. And even now, as I struggle to explain myself, these random Spanish words keep bouncing about.

"Debajo de, alfombra, cuchillo, pensar, rosado!"

Get out, you pesky little bichos (bugs)! I'm trying to think in English!

side notes:

1. My inability to communicate to others in Spanish leaves me feeling helpless and vulnerable, like a child. However, with this trial, I have been blessed with a perspective that gives me more patience and understanding for Carly and Wesley.
Childhood, like our move, is a season of fun and adventure coupled with frustration and confusion. I know Wesley's exasperation as I see him struggle to tell me something or as he tries to "use his words." He understands me, but I don't understand him (a feeling I know all too well). His tears are justifiable. I too was brought to tears as I was unable to explain our situation to a man from the water company that came and abruptly turned off our water (not our fault, the homeowner missed a payment before we moved in). Similarly, when Carly is feeling particularly overwhelmed by all of her new surroundings (language, culture, school, church, friends) and wants to go back home, I know that longing too.

Although my dependence on others is at times riling, I have been blessed with the rare opportunity to learn and grow beside my children. A time to experience new sights, sounds, and places with the awe and amazement of a child. We are learning and growing together and that is a precious gift.

2. Funny story: So, after family scripture study we decided that we would begin saying our family prayers in Spanish (whatever words you know in Spanish you say). It was my turn to pray so I began, "Padre Celestial, gracias..." and then I drew a blank! I had no words--English or Spanish! After a few awkward seconds, Carly gently added in a high pitched mothering tone, "por este dia...". It was so funny to me (the delivery was what killed me) that I began to uncontrollably shake with silent laughter which made Carly and Ammon giggle until we were all laughing out loud. Unsure why we were laughing, but not wanting to be left out, Wesley threw his head back and let out a "mwahahahaha" like a little evil genius! Oh man, our kids are something else!